Dear Darla

The Diary of a 30-Something Smartass



Dear Darla, More than once I’ve had random jackasses respond to or comment on my kickboxing and lifting videos with statements that they think it’s just so hot that I can kick their asses. Those are quickly followed by invitations... Continue Reading →


When Your Man is a Semi Truck

When Your Man is a Semi Truck

Pet Names

Dear Darla, My mom is the best mom in the whole, wide world.  She gives me pet names like Stinky and Dummy. She asks me all the time if today is the day that I want to die.  And if... Continue Reading →

#whitegirlproblems – Fix Number 1

Dear Darla, I’m just going to assume you’re a white girl based off of your name, because that’s clearly logical. And since that’s the case, I believe you will appreciate my PSA.   You have to agree with me that... Continue Reading →

When You Have Balls on Your Brain

Dear Darla, Lately, I’ve been thinking about balls.  Like… a lot. Noooo.   I’m not leading you down what appears to be that predictable dirty path just to abruptly take the expectedly unexpected left turn and confess that I’m suddenly and... Continue Reading →

December Musings

12/4/16 Dear Darla, If one more person tells me that dating is "a numbers game," they are getting throat punched. I don't have a god damn clue what my "number" for this year is, but I guarantee it's much higher than... Continue Reading →

Fuckboys Have Feelings TWO

For all of the poor guys who sent text messages apologizing to me for being a fuckboy...   Let me explain... In regards to my last post: I SWEAR it wasn't about you!  (Although some of your "sorry" texts were... Continue Reading →

Fuckboys Have Feelings Too

Hi Boys and Girls! I'm here to talk to you about today's "Word of the Day"....... FUCKBOY. Eff-You-See-Kay-Bee-O-Why. Fuckboy is a popular and effective slur reserved for only the utmost cantankerous, lily-livered men-children trolling the planet.  They can be described... Continue Reading →

My First Dates are Better Than Yours

In no particular order, a list of this year's memorable first dates, thus far. The time he called 911. I went to dinner with a nice young man one night at little hot spot in town.  I had a hearty... Continue Reading →

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